R1 DEADLAND

[lockdownmods]

[it’s strange, for the people who were already dead, the shift in scenery is sudden and complete. For those who have just arrived? It’s like you’re back where you left?

How strange.

But if you ever need her, you can always reach out to the guardian of this place.]

LOCATIONS
Note: locations lag a week behind the living counterparts

Comments

[devotingly]

[ waver's been pacing the campus, seemingly aimlessly but with an actual goal in mind. to find mitarai. he's not too sure why he wants to do that, considering that he told henry that confronting his murderer wouldn't make him feel any better but...

and when he sees that familiar form, it doesn't matter. it doesn't matter if mitarai is with yoosung or if this won't make him feel any better; he's still making a beeline towards him. ]

YOU!

1/2

[lovedanime]

[Since last week... This only furthers his suspicions of a conspiracy - it's correlated with the cascade of Hank and Connor and Rebecca dying - but it's not something productive to underscore right now. Getting in on this information is far more important. Mitarai isn't so bad at compartmentalization, when the conditions are right and don't set him crying and screaming. Talented or not, Yoosung is making a sound case for them to interact as intellectual equals. The first words out of his mouth are more of this unobtrusive polite serious interest.]

Yes, and I have some familiarity with work other branches of the Future Foundation performed with virtual reality, as well.

[The New World Program... Though he never worked in it directly, and there are many differences; some he already suspects, others not so much. Mitarai has no idea what correlation the offer of a hand could have, so he just takes it at face value - literally takes it in both his hands, not even a handshake but the imploring overhand gesture of a plea or a promise. He can hear footsteps in the distance that make him feel lightheaded. Are they his own footsteps as he races up the stairs to this higher plane of mutual understanding? Yoosung's hand is like a lifeline directly stimulating his societal emotions that had been so negatively affected during the seance he interpreted as fake, and so there's only one way for Mitarai to express his acceptance:]

Please! Reach me through the simula—

yoosung -> waver -> mitarai

[lovedanime]

[That British accent.

It's an incredibly minor detail to fixate on, but everything clicks into place from that. Those footsteps were the same ones Mitarai listened so hard to hear in the hallway between the computer lab and the library. His feeling of floating is that weightless feeling before he hit the ground. The freezing of his mouth before uttering the syllable "tion" is like the locking of his muscles from the taser. Such is trauma, in the literal sense of a hole in the understanding of events, where the emotions from that unexpected moment float back up, in and out of order, even though Mitarai is literally and specifically not the victim in this situation, because Waver is the victim, because Mitarai murdered him, and everything is starting to speed up again, like the blood draining out of his face because he's literally seeing a ghost. Wait, not literally, because Rebecca will have his ass for considering a program a ghost, and, oh my god, ghosts besides Yoosung are real and probably all hate him, and now his fear is starting to build back up as he remembers the sheer amount of aggression aimed at him during the trial, and the stress just rushes out of his mouth in a pathetic scream.]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Mitarai doesn't have a syringe this time. He doesn't even have a door to put between himself and Waver; he's out in the open. What he has is Yoosung, and so Mitarai just clings to the slightly taller man's entire arm like a scared cartoon character hiding from a ghost. He's shaking his head and - he's out of tears to cry at this point but his expression is basically the same.]

I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry— I know that I can't— I'm sorry!!!!!!!!

[starswink]

[One by one, the dominoes crash down. Yoosung's hands slip from Mitarai's clutches as he turns around in alarm at that voice snarling with hate accompanied by the figure running toward them. He barely has time to recognize him as that guy who was judging him when Oswald dragged him to school before Mitarai's deafening wail sets his head spinning. Now he's clinging to him and Waver is still running at them. It is only at this point that his thoughts can finally catch up to reality and hit him with the harsh truth - his blazer may be drenched, but he found the culprit again.

There is no time at all for him to be indignant about the way he was misled by teary confessions to the point that he is only just realizing this NOW. That dude is coming!! What the hell does he do!?

For starters, ALSO SCREAM, because this is definitely enough information to completely overload his .exe!!]

Gaaah!?!?

[But then the apologies start and he just throws a hand up so he doesn't get himself punched for Mitarai of all people.]

Wait! Don't do anything you'll regret!!

[Like all of what he just did, probably maybe. He hugged a murderer....]

[devotingly]

I’m not going to do anything that I’ll regret!

[ waver stops in front of yoosung, glancing to the side to glare at mitarai’s cowering form. though his hands are still balled up into tight fists, he has no intention of physically harming mitarai. ]

I can’t fucking believe you! Not only are you so pathetic that you can’t even kill me instantly with poison, but you do it for the stupidest fucking motive in the world! [ he laughs, bitterly ] What were you gonna do, call the police? Cry to your mommy? Worst of all is that you couldn’t even get away with it! Are you happy now, hm?! Acheived a lot in your life, didn’t ya? Killed the weakest student and couldn’t even get away with it. Congrats!

brainwashing d ★

[lovedanime]

[Mitarai thought a lot about the ethical condemnation his actions would receive. Hearing call-outs for the totally pathetic qualities in these defining actions of his life - lack of talent - psychologically strikes him from a totally unexpected direction. He takes a big step sideways and back, distancing himself from either of the other men. His breath shakes for a few seconds as he gathers his words.]

It's not like I didn't try my best! I planted false evidence! I lied through my teeth to my friends! I knew nobody would ever support my hope, even as the flames of despair leap from world to world! That's exactly why I needed to petition the Future Foundation for the resources to spread peace with a direct psychosomatic stimulus...

[His gaze slides over to Yoosung for a good second. This alliance literally slipping through his fingers like water is not the most pleasant feeling, but those purple eyes were going to see his true nature sooner or later.]

Because anime is the only way I've ever been able to reach people. The wrong way. I've gone through everything alone and just forced people to follow me. This time was the most evil of all. I killed you, Waver Velvet-san. And nobody should ever forgive me for what I've done!

[starswink]

[Yoosung meets Waver's eyes at the retort, grimacing slightly because he walked right into that, but really if he's just chewing Mitarai out then there isn't a reason for him to regret - of course the victim deserves this right. Even if he has all these complicated reasons to continue allowing Mitarai to cower behind him, he nods at that, and spends the rest of his rant looking down over his shoulder at the target of his wrath. He wants to see what he has to say for himself... when he finally lets go, Yoosung turns and keeps his eyes on him, but takes a step back himself so he and Waver are the same distance from him, standing more in alignment. It's not the biggest show of support there is, but he's mainly trying to listen and not get in the way.

This is the second time he's heard a killer's motivations... Neither time has answered the bitter question in Yoosung's own heart of what it would be like if he'd gotten to ask Grantaire why he did it. His mouth twists into a frown when he mentions his lies to friends, knowing that one of those friends would be Terra, but of course a killer would lie. Even Mishima tried to fight his accusations. No one wants to die. It's the administration's fault. But Terra already lost him and Maya... now he's suffering yet again. Yoosung understands that way more than this 'flame of despair' bullshit. But when he talks about peace, it calls to mind the argument they had. And when he looks into his eyes, and talks about psychomatic stimulus, there are goosebumps up his arms because now he finally understands the full picture.]

S-So you were going to do that to me if I'd lived, huh....

[He's already apologized without saying the full extent of what for, but now that he knows it, the apology doesn't make it hurt his feelings less. That someone could conclude so quickly that Yoosung needed to be reprogrammed. Couldn't one of these people privileged with more talent than him cut him a break even once? Photographers, hackers, school administrators, animators, everybody saw his weakness of needing someone to decide for him and immediately wanted a piece of it. At this point, he's really just got to accept it. He felt with his heart that Mitarai was actually a gentle person who wanted to become his friend, and he never had doubted that he wanted everyone to live in peace. Lots of people do, like Rika did. But would she have killed Waver? And that's not even getting into how wrong it is that this is amplified onto the world, no, maybe even universal scale.

Well, Waver can speak for himself. Yoosung just feels numb now.

For a moment, he's silent. And then he just mumbles.]

...You would have... destroyed humanity.

[This is what his perspective as a programmed human turned AI has lead him to believe. Maybe they wouldn't have died, but they would certainly become something else...]

[devotingly]

[ waver is absolutely uncaring of whatever yoosung’s reactions are. he listens to mitarai’s “reasoning” and that alone is ridiculous enough to earn a laugh from him, practically dripping with sarcasm. ]

Hypnosis? For the sake of peace? Don’t bullshit me, brat! [ he slams a hand against the wall, barely noticing the sting. perhaps there’s none— they’re nothing but data at this point. in the back of his head, waver wishes that he was capable of showing mitarai the pain that he felt as he died... but that wouldn’t make him feel any better. hell, even this feels like he’s ripping open the barely sutured wounds again. ]

You wanted to turn everyone into some bloody puppets— of course no one’s gonna support that! And look where that got ya— you’re dead. Now both you and I are stuck in this disgusting computer because you fooled yourself into thinking that you’re some altruist because you wanted to force peace on everyone! So you know what?! I won’t forgive you! I hope the guilt of ruining someone’s life for the sake of an unrealistic and disgusting wish eats you alive!

[ with that said, waver finally stops to catch his breath, his chest rising and falling heavily as proof of how riled up he is. he has absolutely no desire to stay there any longer, though. with the same amount of energy as before, waver walks away; yoosung can deal with the broken pieces of mitarai’s remaining confidence. ]

[lovedanime]

[Mitarai throws out an arm like he's going to reach out and grab Waver to keep him from walking away. But that was only possible when he was carefully leaning against the computer lab door, and it's not like he actually looks forward at all to interacting with Waver ever again. As much as getting forgiven appeals to him, in this case especially Mitarai had not dared to seriously hope. Waver keeps taking those footsteps and Mitarai twitches his upraised arm as if considering waving goodbye, a completely pointless attempt at social nicety. Then Waver is out of the room and Mitarai is just standing there, staring down at his empty outstretched hand.]

It's not unrealistic...

[This petty complaint to himself is the first thing that comes out of his mouth and only builds in intensity.]

You're a mage partnered with a heroic spirit! Our personalities have been completely restored into this computer program! Psychosomatic stimuli have plagued us this whole time!

[Mitarai jerks his head over to Yoosung.]

You can think I shouldn't use my talent, as much as you want! You'd be right; I was making a huge mistake! But you at least believe that I can, don't you? I, I... show you...

[There's a lot of pain that goes into this query and wracks his voice. Ever since Yoosung died, Mitarai has been shut in a reality backwards from his entire past experience - here fatalism about murder is cynical, and the desire for hope he can hold onto is selfish. Yoosung was the only one who really conveyed to Mitarai an equal level of concern about the suffering of the weak - a greater level of concern, to the point where Mitarai legitimately recognized and regretted being so disparaging of talentless people - and that makes him more receptive to Yoosung's critical evaluation of his methods now.]

[starswink]

[He can't blame Waver at all for that reaction. For being sickened to think of your own death used as the catalyst in such a terrible plan. Yes, Yoosung is concerned about suffering. That's why, that desperate inquiry of Mitarai's ... doesn't reach him at all. This is all so awful. The hurt hasn't subsided, and thinking about all of that is just making it worse. He's starting to cry again.]

How the hell should I know?

[He's never watched much anime. It being capable of turning the world into puppets would of course sound far fetched on any normal day. But it's obvious that no one here comes from normal circumstances. Waver being a "mage" or whatever would reinforce that, but Yoosung really does not think that should be a priority right now.]

It's better if we believed you could never do it. In all of the branching timelines that are out there... I hope Waver never has to suffer the way he would feel if he died for that and you actually succeeded. It's bad enough that you killed him for this at all. Can't you even see that?

[He can't even imagine how upset he would be if Grantaire had killed him for something like this. It really pisses him off. He swipes the tears away with the back of his fist. He doesn't know if he can ever forgive him either... He wishes he knew what Terra thought of this. This is just so... bad. His voice comes out cold and harsh.]

Sort your fucking priorities, Mitarai.

[He turns to go, same way Waver did. He doesn't know if he'll actually bump into him after that or if he'd even want him to - he just really doesn't want to be here either.]

[lovedanime]

[Mitarai flinches at the snapped rhetorical question. He's been the one going on about proof to hold onto hope all this time, and yet... asking Yoosung to believe in his completely unseen talent... in the end, isn't Mitarai just asking for trust? He's worse than Vivienne! He doesn't even have a preview! And... more important than that... he doesn't have a supportive eager audience waiting for him to succeed. What he has is Yoosung - or rather, had, because now Yoosung is walking away just like Waver did, quite justifiably, because he murdered Waver and should feel guilty about it. The emotion is starting to catch up to Mitarai, like a bombed building collapsing around him. Just like the times he's been in either type of situation, he's filled with an overpowering desire to run away from it all. But how is he supposed to do that? Go back into his room that he just left? Waver and Yoosung are gone now so it's not like he has to run to get away from them, it could even be the opposite. He really has no idea what to do next if it won't be making anime. Yoosung is right that he has to come up with some other priority. Where do other people get their priorities? Why did Waver grab that scrap of red fabric at such great effort? Mitarai can't understand wanting to hold onto something like that...

Mitarai sits in the chair. He's going to run away from the strain in his hands.]